Full
Kim and I went to IHOP for breakfast this morning, a rare treat. I filled myself with pancakes, eggs, and coffee. Lots of coffee. Then I came home and received the Lent word of the day: Full.
Yes, indeed. I was.
This is really something to think about as we begin a season that is marked by the practice of fasting, giving up something that is of value. It’s not really about suffering or sacrifice (although I guess that depends on how you define sacrifice), but the point of fasting is to make some room for God. To empty ourselves of other things so we can begin to be filled up with the divine, the holy light of God.
So I am thinking today: what am I full of? What is the clutter inside of me?
I am full of anxiety about things I have no power to change. I am full of longings, itches for newness, distraction, diversion. I am full of ideas for stuff I want to do and hope for dreams to come true.
I am full of concern and fear for myself, my loved ones, and the people of Ukraine. I am full of the dread of disappointing people and the aches and pains of an aging body. And, yes, I am full of food.
Yet, Lent calls me to empty myself of all these things and make room for God. Lent calls me to take all these items that are filling me up, and in the spirit of Marie Kondo, hold each one up and ask, “Does this spark joy?”
Is this necessary? Is it useful?
And let it go. With appreciation.
Have mercy, each of these things we hold on so tightly to, these are our feeble attempts to take care of ourselves, to meet our needs, to give ourselves some love.
But maybe we can exchange them for the knowledge – the faith – that there is something better that can care for me, strengthen me, fill me with life.
May we step into this holy season together, ready to make some space for God to enter in.
Photo: I skipped lunch today, but only because I was still too full of pancakes. However, I ate a giant burrito for dinner. And so it goes.
Hahaha!
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